Wednesday, November 4, 2009

~~Mack Truck~~

So...All the family drama and trauma has settled down...thankfully.  All the kids are grown and are successful, productive people.  The puppy is settling in as a 4-year-old dog.  The kittens are being trained.  (Yes, kittens can be trained.)

I have been padding around an empty house, with no career (a move across country and a tanked one can afford "success coaching")...thinking that the best is in the past.  I was quite busy being incredibly sad.

I recently was encouraged to find my birth mother.  So, for the first time in my life, I made a concerted effort.  The findings came with mixed blessings: some good/some horrifying.  If you read this blog, you get it.

As I am recovering from the fog of disbelief, I have to be honest with myself.  I am treading life...not living up to my full potential and making excuses for that fact.  I was needed...usually in crisis only.  Seemingly forgotten otherwise.

This morning, I asked the Universe...yet hit me like a Mack Truck for inspiration for what I needed to be doing.  I asked for a purpose that will be easily sustainable and will provide me the intellectual and creative stimulation I need to grow.  I am currently in mental atrophy.

The Mack Truck came rolling in this morning as I listed my attributes:  

1. I am an internationally recognized communicator.
2. I am an award-winning writer.
3. I am the best facilitator I've ever known or known about.
4. People believe in me...for good reason.
5. I am effective and trustworthy.
6. I love research.
7. I love being at home and having a flexible schedule (or out to lunch with my computer).
8. I am a master critical thinker.

I have figured out what will sustain, intrigue and inspire me, and I am going to pursue becoming an INTERNET INVESTIGATOR.  Started with realization that my mother was murdered.


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